A woman enters marriage, guided by a rich lineage of strong marriages, yet caught in a web of misplaced ideals and expectations deferred by culture. She carries the weight of these histories, as well as her own expectations. When she realizes her marriage is not what it should be, that she has been turned into a flat and unfulfilled version of herself and ultimately files for divorce, the weight of all those expectations and disappointment in her perceived failure practically crushes her.
Using photography, installation, video, embroidery, and the creation of photographic objects (through embroidery and alternative process techniques), this work examines my own expectations upon entering marriage and my current values. The ideals and beliefs I once held dear about marriage and family disintegrated very shortly after entering my own marriage. I have struggled with the weight of having broken a lineage of lifelong, successful marriages. I am now trying to put the pieces back together of an identity I no longer recognize.
How do we examine our ideals and histories after experiencing a related trauma? The Knots on the Underside of the Carpet looks to investigate my own life by revealing the knotted underbelly that we don’t usually see, and exposing the surface as a false veneer, a false image that we as a society have bought into, but of which we ultimately fall flat.